Wednesday 15 August 2007

Someone to watch over me....

There’s a saying old, says that love is blind
Still we’re often told, "seek and ye shall find"
So I’m going to seek a certain lad I’ve had in mind...

Although he may not be the man some
Girls think of as handsome
To my heart he carries the key

Won’t you tell him please to put on some speed
Follow my lead, oh, how I need
Someone to watch over me...
Someone to Watch Over Me...George Gershwin

Well it seems the general consensus is that I should go for it... this online dating thing...especially as some of you think I should share all the gory details of my quest... so in fact, I'm being selfless and doing this for you!

Have been thinking a lot about what kind of man/men I'd like to meet, what would make my heart go ping... and other body parts reverberate...and prompted to think even more following some recent blog posts... doesn't help that I've been listening to Ella Fitzgerald sing the Gershwin Songbook... boy that man could write a melancholy love song...

Mez recently discussed Love or List?... should you make a list of attributes that you might want in a partner, and what if people don't meet the requirements of the list. And Indiana talked about that Dreaded Question - why are you still single? and gave what I think is a wonderfully succinct and heartfelt response "I am yet to meet someone I can rely on to be both there for me and to be the person I need, not just want. I am yet to meet someone whom I can believe enough in to give up my own total self-reliance"

And so, we come to me, and what is it that I am looking for - I've mentioned different things in this blog since I started in February... most recently stating I yearn for someone who gets me... someone who is clever and funny and kind and kooky ... and wants to wrestle naked...no doubt I'll be doing some more thinking about this but here goes...

ADDENDUM: Need to clarify the list below is not a checklist, have no plans to meet someone and then determine whether they are right or wrong based on the below... I'm someone who goes a lot more on gut or intuition in my responses to people, both male and female. It's just a bit of fun about my ideal man... and by putting the desire out there into the universe I'll be curious to see how many of these attributes can be found... though the Naughty, Lusty, Kissable and Available things are non-negotiable!

I do think it's interesting that the commentors to date who have expressed horror have all been male... lol

The ABCs - Miss Frou Frou's Ideal Bloke needs to be:

Available - both physically and emotionally - i.e. live within in a reasonable distance, and actually single
Blokey - I actually don't mind blokey blokes - the blokier they are, the more girlie I become
Clever - not looking for a Mensa candidate, but someone who can hold their own conversationally on a gamut of interests
Dependable - I don't mean a doormat, but if you say you're going to do something, you do it or least let me know if you can't
Employed - don't care what you do, but you need to have some form of work, preferably something that you are passionate about. If you have a mundane job that provides an income for you to follow your muse, that's ok too...
Funny - if you make me laugh, you've almost won me over...
Grounded - for all that I enjoy foolishness, I want someone who has a clear idea of who he is and what he wants, partly cause I need someone to pull me back to earth on occasion
Honest - I will forgive most things, but not lies
Imaginative - linked to funny, clever, lusty, naughty and uninhibited... use your imagination
Juggler - capable of keeping several balls up in the air, work, family, hobbies, me...
Kissable - kissing is important... but I'm not a girl who will kiss someone just because... I need to want to kiss you... and you need to want to kiss me - often!
Lusty - sorry, have no interest in having a purely cerebral relationship... you need to want to play - often!
Manly - I like guys who are masculine - and all that means, not prissy, not afraid to get their hands dirty, a bit hairy, hard in all the right places.
Naughty - I'm pretty open about a lot of things... anyone who is a bit on the conservative side just makes me want to be more and more outrageous
Open Minded- I like odd things... am very tolerant and interested in all sorts of people, you'd need to be a bit the same or we'd bump heads
Persuasive - I'm a hard nut to crack... confess to being high maintenance - you'd need to be somewhere between persistent and pushy - if you pushed to hard, particularly if you dictated, I'm out of here...
Quixotic/ Quirky - fanciful, impulsive, unpredictable but all in a good way
Romantic - not your traditional hearts and flowers type romantic (though that's nice) but someone who would see the romance in small things ... dancing with me around the house, making me a special mix tape, picking flowers out of the garden, singing me to sleep
Sane - while I walk a fine line between slightly eccentric and raving lunatic - you'd need to be well versed in the land of common sense and practicality, but prepared to let go of all that on occasion and come over to my side for awhile
Tactile - I'm a touchy feely girl, when I'm comfortable with someone... think cat... I purr when I'm stroked...
Uninhibited - puritanical and prudish just does not cut it
Verbal - I need to talk, and need someone to talk to... if your main form of communication is grunting, I am not the girl for you
Wise - again, not talking about a Mr Smartpants, but someone who is worldly and discerning.
X Rated - linked to funny, clever, lusty, naughty and uninhibited... I told you already - use your imagination!
Young at Heart - am over the much younger boy thing, but I'm still not quite grown up yet, so am attracted to men who are a bit childlike... not terrible two's childlike... not in to tantrum throwing... just playful
Zany - if you can't see the absurd in things, how on earth are you going to love and treasure me for the dingbat that I am?

13 comments:

Karina said...

What a great list! I don't know that I could put one together as well as that...but it makes pretty good sense to me.

Good luck with the dating, I'm having second thoughts already. ;-)

Karina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dr. Bill Emener said...

A few days ago I offered my "exclusionary characteristics" (obese, mentally unstable, alcoholics, gold diggers and the liars) and suggested that there were very few left. Wow... with your list, albeit laced with humor and an equal amount be-careful-reality, you've cut down the candidates to three (on a good day).
A few years ago my older daughter met a woman I briefly had been dating, and offered her observations (which were accurate and I appreciated it). In my response, nonetheless, I said, "Hey, given the used car lot I'm looking through, all the good ones are gone." (To wit she tongue-in-cheek replied, "Ever look around the car lot you're part of?" -- I wonder where she got that sense of humor?)
Thanks... great Post,
Bill

Miss Frou Frou said...

Karina - noooo... we need to be in this together... will make it much more fun!

Dr Bill - Wow... with your list, albeit laced with humor and an equal amount be-careful-reality, you've cut down the candidates to three (on a good day) yes - but I'm only looking for just the one - so if there were 3 my odds are pretty good!

catsmum said...

Hey you just pinched my list :]
If you find one that's got the goods but is a little bit more ... umm... of mature years ... send him my way okay?

Indiana said...

Good luck with the Internet Dating...having done it for nearly 6 months I know how "interesting" it can be ~lol~

But knowing what you want, at least gives you a page to start on.

Unknown said...

Great Scott, Frou-Frou!

Number One: Toss away the list!

Miss Frou Frou said...

Catsmum - will do! Though I am looking at the more seasoned man a bit differently lately, considering I've always liked 'em younger... at choir I shocked Miss La De Da when she pointed out a cute guy, maybe late 30s and I said, oh no - too young!

Indy - we'll have to compare notes!

Wombat - see my Addendum in response to your comments... lol

Julia Phillips Smith said...

The verbal thing can be a bit tricky, especially with a blokey bloke. My husband comes from a family of non-talkative men, and at first it felt like I had to peel every word from the depths of his being. But they were all so funny/witty/wise that it was worth the effort. Now, we talk and talk and talk and never run out of things to say. Some guys are worth a second tire-kick, if you know what I mean.

Indiana said...

Well I only have two requirements:

1. A heartbeat
2. Her dad owns a brewery.

And even the order of those is up for debate.

Unknown said...

Fair enough, Frou-Frou.

Awaiting results.

Miss Frou Frou said...

Julia - I don't mind a monosyllabic guy, as long as he talks to me! Boomerang Boy was a lot like that, but very different with me, marathon telephone conversations

Indy - lol... wouldn't it be easier if she owned the brewery?

Wombat - watch this space!

Have the T-shirt said...

I like your list...well done (and good luck, you're gonna need it, it's a jungle out there and most of the inhabitants are primates :P)