Can I get you fries with that?

My friend Moon Girl, brought me something amazing back from lunch yesterday... she brought me a man!

Now considering she had lunch at a suburban shopping centre, I was pretty astonished. In particular, as I may have on occasion asked for someone to buy me a sandwich, or a muffin etc. I’ve never actually asked for a man. Probably cause I didn’t know they were so readily available… talk about retail therapy!

Actually what she brought to me was a business card and mobile phone photo of a man she’d meet who was selling raffle tickets. Apparently she had a conversation with him that lead to her asking if he’d like her to pass his details on to her friend (that would be me) and he consented.

This has led to my mulling over a couple of things and raised a number of questions:

Why would she assume I would go for it?

Well, to be fair to MG, I had told her about a chat with a very close friend earlier in the week asking if I might be interested in meeting a friend of her hubby’s that had expressed an interest, and that I had cautiously but tentatively said yes.

And its common knowledge amongst the girls in the office that after licking my wounds over a very on and off relationship, that is now irrevocably off, I was finally open to the possibilities of meeting someone.

Why wouldn't I?

I’ll admit that in the recent past I’ve advertised in both the personals in print and on the net and meet ‘strangers’ via those mediums and actually enjoyed myself, something MG was also aware of.

But I could not get my head around what she’d done, and under no circumstances was I prepared to consider it… though I did have a moment of quiet empathy for this poor guy, who may be looking forward to a phone call that is never going to come.

And in trying to explain to her why yesterday realised the difference to my putting an ad in the paper or a profile on the net and this was, that in the former, I got to control the process and in the later, it was all arranged for me, hence why I cringe at the thought of being set-up.

Why do I seem to attract the lamest set-ups?

When I asked MG what about this guy made her think I’d be interested – her response was that he was single and 47 – right status, right age, why not? Oh, and he was taller than me, but considering I’m 5ft 2 that’s not exactly unusual.

This made me recall similar thought processes from friends and family including my sister and her husband trying to set up with one of his friends by saying we had a lot in common i.e. he was fat too!

Or my godbrother arranging for a friend’s brother-in-law to be at their home one evening when I was visiting – again with the, he’s single, you’re single line. Sounds fine, except the guy wore a parachute silk tracksuit and admitted that his favourite movies were the Porkys series. When he took out a tiny comb and started to groom his moustache at the dinner table, I made my excuses… and gave my godbrother a clip over the ear next time I saw him.

Why would a man agree to having his photo and number taken in the first place?

This is the most fascinating question! I would be more likely to agree to be used as a human cannonball than I would to having my photo and phone number passed on to a stranger, so assumed that this guy smacked of desperateness.

MG challenged me, by saying would I have reacted differently if he’d looked like George Clooney, which he didn’t, but then there’s only one George Clooney, and the only thing I’d be interested in in that instance would be if the raffle tickets were for being allowed to lick George from top to bottom…very, very slowly (oops, I digress)

And I could honestly say that if he’d been incredibly attractive I would have thought it even stranger… why would an incredibly attractive man agree?

And I puzzled over it, until I spoke to my friend Peter Rabbit, who kindly allows me, on occasion, into the inner workings of the mind of a single, heterosexual male.

Peter said of course he consented, as Peter would have readily done if Moon Girl. had spoken to him. He was a guy, and guys usually take what opportunities come their way.

Though I’m not so sure about Peter… considering we are friends because he responded to a personals ad that went:

ME = funny, smart, loyal, independent, articulate, loving, spontaneous, honest and sometimes difficult and argumentative

YOU = ???

You’d think he’d have learned his lesson by now…