Things I have learned... in no particular order of importance...

• Drooling and dribbling and sighing 'oh my god, look at the size of his hands' is probably not the most appropriate response when being introduced to the very cute, but very young (28) new guy at work...

• I am not much of a team player... I love working as part of a team, as long as no-one else is doing MY job...

• I do not delegate well...

• Working 10-12 hours days for 3 weeks in a row in order to have a week off kinda defeats the purpose of having a holiday...

• Particularly when you then go back to working 10-12 hour days on your return...
  

• Telling men that you need to mother-proof your house prior to a visit has them thinking of p0rn and a drawerful of goodies... and their eyes glaze over...

• As does telling them that you are going on a d1ck-free weekend with your girlfriends...
  

• Having slightly hairy legs on a girls away weekend is probably better than attempting to shave said legs at midnight in the bathtub when you've spent the previous 48 hours doped up to the gills due to back spasm...

• Legs bleed a lot...

• Starting belly dancing lessons is probably not the smartest thing to do when you are in the middle of a full blown fibromyalgia episode...

• People think it's funny that the one body part that gets injured after belly dancing lesson number one is your ANKLE...

• Keeping quiet about the boobage and bum cramp after your first belly dancing lesson is probably not a bad thing...

• Men, want to talk to me and feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and feelings with me, which is lovely...

• Feeling comfortable enough to shut up and just jump my bones on occasion would be even lovelier...

• Despite the fact that I often make reference to being a little fat girl, and my humour is self-deprecating, I actually like myself, a lot...

• Which is probably just as well, as it becomes clearer every day that my world and the rest of the planet are often slightly out of kilter and it's likely to be a long while before a lovely man tells me to shut up and jumps my bones...

• Just as well I'm an optimist... someday my prince will come... sigh!

Sorry... you know what they say... if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all... well... that's why I've been so quiet...

Everybody's doing it, doing it, doing it...

Wouldn't this be a great world if insecurity and desperation

made us more attractive? If "needy" were a turn-on?...Broadcast News

Well considering this seems to be going around the blogosphere at the speed of light, I should play. You just plug in your name in the search bar at Google along with “needs” and then post your results. Frou Frou didn't work - Vicki/Vikki did...

Some of my favourites:

Vikki needs to get a life ... sigh... even Google is condemning me...

Vikki needs to take a long trip and come back with a new personality... see, what I mean...

Vikki needs to start acting her age ... considering yesterday at work I said someone was fairly handsome despite being old, only to have everyone laugh at me, as this guy is a ONE year older than me, I think Google may be right...

Vikki needs something translated ... actually I do, someone has left a comment on my blog, in what I think is Spanish... can anyone help me... last comment here?

Vikki needs a hero ... yes, preferably one who looks like this...

Vicki needs some one to teach her about love ... yes, preferably one who looks like this...

Vikki needs to interact with more people ... yes, preferably one who looks like this...

Vikki needs some new glasses for close up work ... ok, sorry, but I have too... yes, preferably with someone who looks like this...

Vicki needs to get some balls ... umm, dare I say it... yes, preferably...

Vikki Needs A Spanking ... oh.. really, well, if you insist...

Vikki needs to dump that fake loser boy ... ok, but only after he's spanked me...

Vikki needs to dump his ass pronto ... alright, already... give me a minute will ya!

Vikki needs to realize that dogs are not little people in furry costumes ... are you sure about that...

Vikki needs to learn about "she bang" magic. As in "she bang" her head against the wall with absolutely no knowledge and no reference books to offer a clue? ... I love this... "she bang" magic, indeed...

Vikki needs to get some sleep ... always...

Vikki needs to shut right up ... even Google thinks I talk too much...

Excuse me while I melt into a puddle of lust....

Will confess, I have always had a bit of a thing for Eric Balfour, since the early days of Six Feet Under, when he played Claire Fisher's boyfriend Gabriel Dimas, he of the toe-sucking fetish, in the first series.

Yes, I know... he's only 30... but if I was ever going to make a movie of my strange and twisty relationship with Boomerang Boy, he'd be perfectly cast as Boomerang Boy, who was 23 to my 36 when we first met. And then I'd just have to convince everyone that I was a good enough actress to play me.... oohhh....

While Mr Balfour is a lot more exotic, and a lot more ummm shall we say buff... the shape of him, the long lean length of him, his nose, his eyes, and definitely his smile remind me very much of BB.

The footage in this montage comes from a movie Lie With Me, which I tracked down having seen some clips on YouTube... Eric and Lauren Lee Smith star in what is described as a romantic drama with explicit unsimulated sex scenes and full frontal nudity.... I decided after I'd watched the movie oh... two or three times... in a row.... that it's not the greatest film... actually the clips on YouTube are more romantic... but heah... who cares... I have five words for you... Eric Balfour full frontal nudity!

EDIT: Sorry, I confused a few people - no full frontal nudity in the clip here... this is just very PG snippets from the movie and photo shoots of the hunky one. The full frontal nudity is in the DVD that I'm wearing a groove in at home...