I hope I never....

As I've been a bit of a slack-arse with both posting and keeping up to date with friends blogs I didn't realise that Karina had tagged me to do a meme and tell you 5 things about me I've never told before. Karina put a great spin on her meme and revealed 5 things she's never done... so I'm going to do the same but with a twist 5 things I hope never to do... or never to do again!

One: Work early morning shifts
My ideal job would be a job that started at midday... actually last week I did a couple of days where I worked till 8.00pm... it was bliss. Even though I started work at my normal time, I got so much work done between 4.00-8.00pm I am seriously thinking of asking if I can change my hours so that I work till 7.30pm (at least during the summer and daylight savings). Can't work till 8.00pm as I discovered last week at exactly 8.00pm the alarm activates... frightened me half to death...

Gone are the days where I will willing start work at 7.00am (unless I can work in my pj's!)

Two: Stand on the observation deck of any high rise building
I've discovered it's not heights I'm afraid of so much... it's falling. I can look out the window of a plane, can even stand at a lookout and look off into the distance... just don't ask me to look down! Famous at a previous workplace for going green at the gills and almost fainting when the electrician climbed over a guardrail and balanced precariously while trying to change a light globe. Equally as famous for refusing to walk into a training room with floor to ceiling windows in the high-rise Rialto building and then collapsing in a shaking heap when the trainer tried to reassure me by pressing his entire body against the glass.

I think in a previous life I was the virginal maiden sacrificed to the gods by being chucked into a volcano!

Three: Go to see the Monster Trucks, Car Racing, Motorbike Grand Prix et al.
I knew it was luuurv with Boomerang Boy when I agreed to go to the Monster Trucks with him one night instead of going for a walk to see the Christmas Lights along the Boulevard... sigh...

To make matters worse... he then proceeded to spend the rest of the night roaming around with his best buddy, turns out I was invited along to keep his mate's heavily pregnant girlfriend company so the boys could go watch their toys and dream....

Three: Internet Dating (those Lonesome Losers websites)
Conversation with the Nature Boy today about the ridiculous real estate prices at present that went off on a typically strange (for us) tangent:

MFF: I will probably rent for the rest of my life as I won't be able to afford to buy a house.
NB: Yes, you will.
MFF: Only if I find a man who wants to keep me in the style I wish to be accustomed to!
NB: Well, that'll happen too!
MFF: Do you think so?
NB: Yes!
MFF: I don't think that's very likely... in order to meet someone you actually need to leave the house!
NB: Well, eventually... but you could meet him and get to know him online
MFF (shaking her head furiously): Seriously... no way... the last guy I met online told me he had to leave early even before I got my coat off... and then ended up staying around for 3 hours, paying for my dinner, telling me he had a great time and would like to see me again and then a week later ringing me and saying he would like to stay in touch but he was pursuing other options and by the way he had found himself strangely aroused by me, had I been trying to arouse him and had I been aroused too!
NB (laughing): That is kind of weird...
MFF: That's the thing, he seemed so normal too... I think it's me... I bring out the odd in people
NB: Yeah, I can relate to that... (laughing)

Five: Go camping...
Back in the day when I advertised in the personals, probably a good 80% of the men who responded to my advert after telling me their name and occupation and the suburb they lived in told me they liked going camping! There was one memorable guy in his voicemail who said in a fairly decent Sylvester Stallone/Rocky Balboa voice 'Ummm... I like going fishin' and campin'... and ummm... walks on the beach, and ummm going to the movies, but I 'specially like fishin' and campin'...'

Before anyone yells at me... I realise that there are lots of people who like camping, including some females... but not this little fat duck! My idea of roughing it is a 3 star motel! And I once told Peter Rabbit that I really liked the great outdoors... as I watched it out the window on my way to the bed and breakfast!

I also told him earlier in the year, when he suggested that cuddling up in a sleeping bag was romantic, that I wasn't adverse to sharing a sleeping bag, or a tent for that matter... the man of my dreams will pitch that tent in the middle of the living room or better yet the penthouse at the Hyatt.

Extra! Extra! Read all about it... Miss Frou Frou unmasked...

One of my favourite bloggers, Candid Karina recently posted her response to this great new meme.

The Rules: A blogger interviews you, and you post the answers on your own blog. Then you invite readers to volunteer to be interviewed, and you interview THEM, and they post it on their blog, and on and on we go...

I volunteered to be interviewed and below are Karina's great questions and my long-winded fluffy waffle in response... Anyone that would like me to interview them... leave a note in my comments...

1. First, let's get the obvious out of the way: Tell us the when, how and why about the birth of your blog.

I started blogging in February in a typically round and round the garden Frou Frou way... I met the Nature Boy just over 12 months ago... and almost from the get go we had these games of email tag. He's the King of short responses, a skill I've yet to master (no really - says everyone!) but he used to enjoy my mini-stories and general lunacy... and constantly encouraged me to write... something he continues to do... which is unbelievably lovely.

Around the same time, I happened across the blog Reasons You Will Hate Me and became an avid lurker, enjoying MsFits and her fans and detractors, Friday Q&A becoming a must read every Saturday morning over my Vitabrits. And from there started reading others, and got a bit of a hang for how this all worked... had heard of blogs but never read one... what can I say... I'm technically backward... only buying a DVD player a year ago, and cracking everyone up today trying to connect a USB to a laptop... but I digress...

So, started to think that blogging would actually suit me. I like writing, have always been comfortable with email as a form of keeping up with people, and blogging is just a way to do it on a much broader stage. Those that know me, say my emails are like having a conversation with me, reading my words and they hear my voice... and friends in RL who have read here say the same. (Though there aren't many RL friends reading anymore... or if they are they are lurking... come out, come out wherever you are).

2. Your blog name...explain please.

My friend Roz's former husband, K was a mad Englishman who introduced me to soccer, beer with lime, "Dirty Old Town" drunkenly sung, and the phrase... I used to be, but I'm alright now... every time you were making conversation and said something like "I/he/she/they/your like, want, are ....., etc. his response would be "I used to be .... but, but I'm alright now" often to much jocularity...

Try it...

You're nice... I used to be nice, but I'm alright now... She's skinny... I used to be skinny, but I'm alright now etc.

He did it so often, that I used to end the sentence for him, and then started saying it myself, something I still do...

3. So, you're a single woman, and have recently said you might be ready to get back out on the dating scene. You've told us what you would want in a man, but tell us, what are the things you miss most about relationships?

My relationships have always been unconventional, with none being similar to the others, and have spent more time single then coupled in my life.

What do I miss?

That lovely butterflies in your tummy feeling when you're going to see him, or you hear his voice... kisses... cuddles and hugs... someone to share the end of the day with (the mental debrief sharing tales of woe and silliness)... a sense of belonging, I'm his/ he's mine and the comfort that comes from that feeling... someone to scratch the middle of my back when it's itchy... and to tell me when I've tucked my skirt into my underpants again!

4. To borrow a question asked of me in my own interview, tell us about your worst date ever.

My first recollection on reading this was the date with a guy from the personals who seemed like a nice guy, but had unfortunate teeth... he had fangs! Though really, apart from the fact there was no way I was ever going to kiss that face, it wasn't a bad date.

So, my worst date... is complicated.

Around the same time I meet Vampire boy, I talked to Jay who turned out to live a couple of streets away, and ran a local myotherapy clinic. When I spoke to him, he was funny, quick, clever and a bit arrogant (all things that interest me) and he seemed really keen... particularly when in response to a question from him I told him I'd had over 100 responses and I was talking and meeting quite a few guys over the coming weeks. We talked a couple of times and then organised to meet for dinner at a local pizza place.

Sitting in the restaurant waiting for a stranger is always nerve-wracking... and my nerves only escalated when a very attractive, nicely dressed Jay wandered in and introduced himself. Now, I know I have wonderful qualities and that people love and have loved me... but Jay was just... I don't know... too good looking, too cool, too smooth, too confident... and in a weird way that calmed my nerves.

Figuring it was unlikely I'd ever go out with him again, I just relaxed and enjoyed myself. We had a great dinner, which he insisted on paying for and he offered to walk me to my car. On the walk to the car he said, I'd like to see you again, much to my surprise. I said I was busy for the next couple of weeks, which made him laugh, and he said - so how about I ring you in a fortnight. (I now realise this was all about Jay needing to stay on my list... not necessarily because of me, but a competition thing... he could choose not to see me, but didn't want me to cross him of my list of 100 - he used to constantly ask how many people were still on the list, and I used to laugh and say how do you know you have even made the list!)

Still, I was surprised when he did as he said and rang me in a fortnight, and asked me to come over to his place after he'd finished work one night... something I wasn't prepared to do at that point.

But he pushed, I want to see you again... so I said I was going out to a local Irish pub on Friday night with some friends, he could meet me there if he wanted to and in the conversation said to him, if you're going to be a bit uncomfortable about fronting up with a whole bunch of strangers you could bring along some of his friends.

Friday night... really, really crowded pub... hanging with my mates, keeping an eye out for Jay and I spotted him and said to Miss La De Da 'Oh there he is, the blonde in the leather jacket standing by the leadlight window' and she turned and looked and then turned back to me and said 'what - the guy with his tongue down somebodies throat?'.

??? I looked and sure enough he's deeply kissing a pretty young thing! Jay stopped, and then put his arm around her, and then another girl came up and the three of them went up to the bar, with the original girl hanging all over him.

MLDD said are you going to go up to him, and I said no, I'll let him come to me. And we sat there, and waited while he scanned the room looking for me, passing his gaze over me several times, but not actually making eye contact. It was like I was invisible, or else he had forgotten what I looked like...

This went on for almost an hour... he deep in conversation with both girls, occasionally scanning the room I'm assuming looking for me, and occasionally kissing the pretty blonde. And all the time I was sitting in plain view about 4 feet away from him. Eventually, Jay and the two girls left.

He rang me the following day... "Hi - what happened last night, I was there but didn't see you?". "I know" says I, "I saw you".

"Why didn't you come up?" says he. "You were a bit busy at the time" says I dryly. He laughed out loud... and then asked "What did your friends say?"

"My mate said you were a 'root rat'!" Again, he laughed. "Oh, I kick 'em first to make sure they're still breathing! What did you say to that?"

"I didn't care if he was a 'root rat' as long as I was the rat he was rooting!"

Again, he laughed... declaring I was the funniest girl he knew and he really wanted to see me again. To which I replied "Sorry, one of the things you need to know about me is I hate standing in queues".

I never dated him again, though he persisted for a few weeks, and for a couple of months we used to occasionally bump into each other around the neighbourhood. Haven't seen him for a few years, and the myotherapy clinic is gone... so don't know where he ended up.

5. If you could have dinner with any celebrity, alive or dead, who would it be, and why?

I'd like to host a dinner party (not cook... just host) and I'd invite:

Jamie Oliver and Nigella Lawson - they can have a cook off!
Kate Hepburn and Spencer Tracy - cause it would be nice to see them together one more time and Kate is my hero...
Robert Redford, Johnny Depp and George Clooney... gorgeous men who have/ do make interesting films and George cause he's the archetypal funny, quick, clever and a bit arrogant man...

Remember, if you want me to interview you, leave a not in comments.

The Moaning Meme...

"I need not suffer in silence while I can still moan, whimper, and complain" Anonymous

I probably should be moaning about memes as I got tagged THREE times in the last week... but I ain't complaining.

My friend, Candid Katrina - who writes great things and has the best Wordless Wednesdays by the way, so go check her out, if you don't read her already... tagged me for this one... created by The Freelance Critic.

He says: "If you've ever listened to people talking on a bus you'll know that most of what they say is negative. They talk about things they hate, people that annoy them and boyfriends that let them down before they even think about mentioning the 'nice things.'

All of us do it. We find it natural, when with a friend, to moan.In fact a recent study has shown that the most effective form of human bonding is moaning and gossiping.Yet our blogs, the social tools of the 21st century, are populated by memes listing our 'favourites,' or our 'blessings,' or our 'funniest' moments. In our efforts to be readable we have denied others the one thing that makes us interesting - our whining, moaning, complaining selves.And so I am pleased to present the first ever Moaning Meme! The meme that will teach us all a bit more about each other and ourselves.It's time to spread some Personality... "

The Moaning Meme

5 people who will be annoyed you tagged them.

1. Wylie

2. Rhian (only cause I think her answers to this will be a crack-up)

3. Starrlight - cause she tagged me!

4. Anne

5. Gabriella

4 things that should go into room 101 and be removed from the face of the earth.

One - Low Fat icecream - seriously, if I'm going to have icecream, then I want the highest level of fat available

Two - Compound Chocolate

Three - Late night infomercials - what happened to oldey, late night movies, so if you couldn't sleep you could at least watch something interesting while you did your ironing at 3.00am

Four - The assumption that just because you're round, you are also tall! Am sick of chopping 5 or more inches of the bottom of pants... though maybe if I wasn't so particularly about 1 and 2 this might not be a problem

3 things people do that make you want to shake them violently.

One - Be rude to wait staff or telephone canvassers... somebody has to do this job... be nice

Two - hog parking spots, so that you can't get in front of them or behind them

Three - complain about the rain... we're experiencing a drought people... you should be thankful

2 things you find yourself moaning about.

One - why I can't meet anyone who wants to race me off...

Two - spoonfeeding people at work, which means I never have time to do my own work

1 thing the above answers tell you about yourself.

I'm not very tolerant of people who are intolerant! And I obsess about food, a lot!

RULES:*Link to the original meme at FreelanceCynic.com so people know what it's all about!*Be as honest as possible, This is about letting people get to know the real you!*Try not to insult anyone - unless they really deserve it or are very, very ugly! *Post these rules at the end of every meme!Finally remember, cynical is sexy. At least that's what I'm hoping...

Birthday Meme... tagged by Chicken Scratch

I got tagged by Xine the other day, just haven't had a chance to play yet!

Here are the rules: You go to http://www.wikipedia.org/ and type in your birthday (only month & day). Then you write down 3 events, 2 births, 1 holiday, and then you tag 5 friends.

Me, being the wild and crazy non-conformist I am - have added some comments of my own!

MARCH 10

EVENTS:

1. 1831: The French Foreign Legion is established by King Louis-Phillippe to support his war in Algeria. Oh.. I love a man in uniform... Beau Geste, anyone?

2. 1876: Alexander Graham Bell makes the first telephone call by saying "Mr Watson, come here, I want to see you" Had to pick this one... considering what a phone girl I am... Call me, Call me, now....

3. 1982: Syzygy: all 9 planets align on the same side of the Sun. How cool would this be? Will need to check out the astrological ramifications of something like this... this was the year I turned 21, and on arriving home for a quiet birthday dinner was told my 30 year old cousin had died of a heart attack.




BIRTHS:

1. 1903 - Leon Bismark "Bix" Beiderbecke - jazz musician

2. 1958 - Sharon Stone - actress. When I once announced at bowling that Sharon Stone and I shared a birthday, my nephew, 14 at the time, announced sotto voce, "I know whose birthday party I'd rather be going to"... which had the group laughing out loud, and Boomerang Boy telling the brat to run for his life before I caught him...

HOLIDAY:

1. Doctor's Day - Venzuela Couldn't find much information on Doctor's Day. Here in Victoria, every couple of years, the Labour Day holiday is celebrated on March 10, and that long weekend was also the Moomba festival - home of the great Birdman Rally. As a child I used to think the festival was all for my benefit. What was believed to be an aboriginal word for 'lets get together and have fun' it has since been discovered that Moomba is vernicular for 'up your bum'

Tagging:

1. Sheila - Aubirdwoman
2. The Cats Mum
3. Starrlight
4. Gabriella
5. Dr. Bill

Everybody's doing it, doing it, doing it...

Wouldn't this be a great world if insecurity and desperation

made us more attractive? If "needy" were a turn-on?...Broadcast News

Well considering this seems to be going around the blogosphere at the speed of light, I should play. You just plug in your name in the search bar at Google along with “needs” and then post your results. Frou Frou didn't work - Vicki/Vikki did...

Some of my favourites:

Vikki needs to get a life ... sigh... even Google is condemning me...

Vikki needs to take a long trip and come back with a new personality... see, what I mean...

Vikki needs to start acting her age ... considering yesterday at work I said someone was fairly handsome despite being old, only to have everyone laugh at me, as this guy is a ONE year older than me, I think Google may be right...

Vikki needs something translated ... actually I do, someone has left a comment on my blog, in what I think is Spanish... can anyone help me... last comment here?

Vikki needs a hero ... yes, preferably one who looks like this...

Vicki needs some one to teach her about love ... yes, preferably one who looks like this...

Vikki needs to interact with more people ... yes, preferably one who looks like this...

Vikki needs some new glasses for close up work ... ok, sorry, but I have too... yes, preferably with someone who looks like this...

Vicki needs to get some balls ... umm, dare I say it... yes, preferably...

Vikki Needs A Spanking ... oh.. really, well, if you insist...

Vikki needs to dump that fake loser boy ... ok, but only after he's spanked me...

Vikki needs to dump his ass pronto ... alright, already... give me a minute will ya!

Vikki needs to realize that dogs are not little people in furry costumes ... are you sure about that...

Vikki needs to learn about "she bang" magic. As in "she bang" her head against the wall with absolutely no knowledge and no reference books to offer a clue? ... I love this... "she bang" magic, indeed...

Vikki needs to get some sleep ... always...

Vikki needs to shut right up ... even Google thinks I talk too much...

If every word I said could make you laugh, I'd talk forever...

Rhian tagged me for this meme... only one word responses... a bit like chinese water torture...

Answer all questions using only 1 word :

1. Where is your cell phone? bag
2. Relationship? Please!
3. Your hair? multi-coloured
4. Work? OHS
5. Your sister? Different
6. Your favorite thing? people
7. Your dream last night? erotic
8. Your favorite drink? vodka
9. Your dream car? red
10. The room you’re in? family
11. Your shoes? plentiful
12. Your fears? manageable
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? published
14. Who did you hang out with this weekend? Miss La De Da
15. What you’re not good at? dancing
16. Muffin? Bran
17. One of your wish list items? piano
18. Where you grew up? Melbourne
19. The last thing you did? ate
20. What are you wearing? clothes?
21. What aren’t you wearing? makeup
22. Your pet? cats
23. Your computer? necessary
24. Your life? taking-off
25. Your mood? exhausted
26. Missing? you
27. What are you thinking about right now? sleep
28. Your car? dirty
29. Your kitchen? warm
30. Your summer? gone
31. Your favorite color? red
32. When is the last time you laughed? today
33. Last time you cried? today
34. School? finished
35. Love? Please!

And I tag ... Sheila, Julia and Soozii

True Confessions ... eight things about me...

Rhian/Crowwoman tagged me to do this meme...

Here are the rules according to whomever likes to makeup rules (not me):
1. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves. (blah, blah blah)
2. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. (Duh.)
3. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names. (See item 1 below - if you want to do this you can, but I ain't gonna tag you - probably cause I'd struggle to find 8 people to tag!)
4. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog. (Duh, again)

One... While I am usually very amiable, I can be mulish and obstinate, and don't cope very well with being 'told' what to do... and will often surprise people if they dare me or goad me into doing something foolish... as most people will say while I can be a bit madcap, I am usually sensible... but while I am aware of the need for rules, I will often then disregard them if it suits me, and it harms none... particularly if someone 'expects' me to react sensibly... contrary is my middle name!

Two... I am completely left side dominant... left handed, left footed. My 1st grade teacher tried to make me write with my right hand, by making me sit on my left hand all through class. I was utterly miserable for weeks, but didn't want to tell my Mum what was happening, as the teacher said that left-handedness was a freak of nature... I was 5 or 6 at the time. My best friend told her Mum that I'd cried at recess, and her Mum told mine, and I saw my Mum for the first time in all her Mama bear fury descend on this woman. Apparently, the first time I ever reached for something I used my left hand and I've been doing it ever since. Being so left side dominant has meant that I cannot march - instead of stepping with my left leg, swinging with my right arm, I swing and step from the same side... hence I fall over a lot!

Three ... for all of my brazen, out there persona, that means I can talk a mile a minute to almost anyone, I get terrible stage fright if I have to speak in front of others in a more formal setting, like at a meeting or training session. Literally sick with fear... and in the weeks prior to every Tap concert every time I walked down a flight of stairs I'd have this mental thought - "maybe it won't hurt so much if I throw myself down these, cause if I break or sprain my ankle I'll have an excuse to get out of having to go on stage" Of course, the incredible rush afterwards that I had gone out there and conquered my fear was fantastic, even if I was probably dancing the routine perfectly, just 3 beats either ahead or behind the others

Four... have you seen The Truth About Cats and Dogs? Do you remember the telephone scene with Ben Chaplin and Janene Garofalo? I've done that, but instead of him convincing me, I convinced him... I liked it.... a lot... a real lot.... geez I'm turning myself on just remembering...

Five... I can't wink... and I can only click my fingers with my left hand... my right hand makes no sound. Nor can I curl my tongue, wiggle my ears or raise only one eyebrow. Though I can cross my eyes like this... taught myself to do it by staring at the tip of my nose.

Six... I am and have always been a 'good' girl, a 'good' child, a 'good' friend, a 'good' worker etc. and deep inside I yearn to be 'bad'... I'd like to break some one's heart, trash the office, have wild and wanton sex in public places with the 'wrong sort' of man... and do things not because I don't know better... but because I can...(actually I wouldn't want to break some one's heart... )

Seven... as a little girl I used to lie in the darkness of my bedroom with my eyes open wide and slowly blot out all visual and sensory stimulation and imagine that this is what it felt like to be dead... this feeling of blankness and nothingness ... and was sometimes so successful at emptying my head of all conscious thought that I would literally terrify myself... even now I live almost exclusively in my head, often forgetting my physical self, until my body reminds me, usually by getting ill. Except now my brain is rarely restful, even meditation only slows the revs down a little, but never makes them completely stop... I wonder if I've convinced myself if I stop thinking I'll die...

Eight... I spent most of my teens and twenties being invisible, playing the role that was assigned to me. That good girl thing... though I obviously showed my true self to some, those people that I've loved and who have loved me during and since that time. I'm pretty much over being invisible, and sick of being afraid... you may not like me, but I'll be damned if you'll ever forget me... and if at the end of my life they say 'she was a bit out there, but gee she was fun, and she made me (laugh, cry, mad or horny' I'll be happy...


I got my name in lights with notcelebrity.co.uk

Wow... that was weird...as for the name in lights... I got it from Savannah's site, and it seems to fit with item eight... so...

Thursday Thirteen #2...13 Things about my name/s

Am posting this Wednesday night as I have to be up and out early tomorrow morning and not sure when I'll get home!



In setting up this blog I tried hard to ensure that I was relatively anonymous, and pretty much had that blown out of the water the first time someone from RL posted a comment, when they outed me... so... my name is Vikki, and I'm a blogger...

Thirteen Things ABOUT MY NAME/S...
One: Miss Frou Frou is my tap dancing name, given to me by a work colleague cause he used to laugh ever time I came to work moaning and groaning and often limping having kicked myself in the heel with my tap shoe as an Absolute Beginner at Miss Lou Lou's Tap Dancing Academy

Two: My real name is Vicki, but someone years ago, used to regularly send me a telex (I told you it was years ago) with my name miss spelt to VIKKI... and something about the way it looked appealed to me, so I started to use it.

Three: My mother hated the way I spelt my name insisting that my name was spelt Vicki, until we were organising wills etc. and I discovered that she too changed the spelling of her name when she was 18 - she should be a Loris but she spells it Lauris after a book character.

Four: I've been told by a numerologist that I should revert back to my original spelling if I want to have a successful relationship. What does it say about me that I'd rather have my name spelt the way I want than a man!

Five: At work, in my department there are two Vicki's. The head of the department started referring to me as Vikki 2K from the beginning, and it has now spread across the organisation and is occasionally shortened to V2K.

Six: A former work colleague, who jokingly referred to me as Victoria repeatedly, when I protested, started calling me Queensland instead (Victoria is a state in Australia, as is Queensland - get it!). Mind you, this is the same man, that called Romy, 'where for art thou' - certainly confusing visitors by regularly bursting into the office saying 'Queensland, where is where for art thou?' - to which I'd calmly reply - 'at the bank'

Seven: Boomerang Boy rarely called me by name, to the point that I used to often feel I could have been anyone to him. He used to say that saying my name out loud made him feel funny, but couldn't explain why. I stopped using his name in retaliation and he didn't notice....

Eight: So I notice when men freely use my name, it makes me trust them... when maybe sometimes I shouldn't...

Nine: Having a name starting with V often means you get picked last. And thinking about hosting a party with a theme come as something that starts with the first letter of your name can be restrictive: - vase, violin, vamp, vixen, vampire - and always some wag who suggests you come as a vibrat0r.

Ten: It's surprising the way people can miss spell my name - I've had Viki, Vickie, Vicky and my personal favourite when you spell it and say it's a double K - Vickkie - they're just hedging their bets.

Eleven: And people have trouble pronouncing it too... kids kind of lisp it out ... giving it a 'w' sound .... wicki... my cousin used to call me wicki or wicks and then his dad started calling me wickers. And a workmate used to call me 'picki' - completely unable to pronounce the 'v' regardless of coaching.

Twelve: My mother wanted to call me Melissa, cause she liked it. At the time, 1961, it wasn't a particularly popular name, but became much more popular later, one of my closest friends is a Melissa as is my god-sister. My Dad wanted to call me Gwenda or Judith, after old girlfriends.

Thirteen: So were did Vicki come from? I was named after the lawn mower...arguing over a girls name almost up to my birth, my Dad was mowing the lawn and said to my Mum, what do you think of Vicki? She liked it, and I'm thankful, but even more thankful that the lawnmower was a Victa and not a Black and Decker!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Real Women .... the musical

Today I realised that I hadn't done the Real Woman MEME that Sheila tagged me on. Will admit that I've struggled a bit with this one... what is a real woman... you're asking me? I think it's the word 'real' that I have a problem with, it's a judgement, I struggle a lot with words that can be seen as judgement ... like normal, ordinary... real!

Last night I went to see The Sound of Music Drag Show, as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Talk about laugh until you almost pee... though I will never be able to watch The Sound of Music again without rethinking the Baroness and Maria's relationship!

In the car driving back to where we had all parked in nearby Richmond, we were singing various show tunes, as you do! And today have been thinking about songs from musicals that I feel some connection with, as a woman... so a tongue in cheek response to what is a real woman, as defined by Miss Frou Frou and the wonderful world of musical theatre...

Real Women look out for their friends…
We'll always be bosom buddies, Friends, sisters and pals;
If life should reject you, There's me to protect you.
If I say that your tongue is vicious, If I call you uncouth;
It's simply that who else but a bosom buddy, Will sit down and tell you the truth.

Tho' now and again I'm aware that my candid opinion may sting,
Tho' often my frank observation might scald;
I've been meanin' to tell you for years, you should keep your hair natural like mine,
If I kept my hair natural like yours, I'd be bald.

Each time that a critic has written, "Your voice is the voice of a frog!"
Straight to your side to defend you I rush;
You know that I'm there ev'ry time that the world makes and unkind remark,
When they say "Vera Charles is the world's greatest lush!"

I feel it's my duty to tell you it's time to adjust to your age; you try to be "Peg O' My Heart", when you're "Lady Macbeth."
Exactly how old are you, Vera? The truth! Well, how old do you think? I'd say somewhere in between forty and the death!
Bosom Buddies, Mame, Jerry Herman

Real Women make their own lives…
There's gotta be something better than this,
There's gotta be something better to do.
And when I find me something better to do,
I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna get out I'm gonna get up, get out and do it!

There's gotta be some respectable trade,
There's gotta be something easy to learn.
And if I find me something a halfwit can learn,
I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna get out, I'm gonna get up, get out and learn it!

There's gotta be some life cleaner than this,
There's gotta be some good reason to live.
And when I find me some kind of life I can live,
I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna get out, I'm gonna get up, get out and live it!
There’s Got to Be Something Better Than This, Sweet Charity, Coleman/ Fields

Real Women lead by example…
Careful the things you say, Children will listen.
Careful the things you do, Children will see.
And learn.

Children may not obey, But children will listen.
Children will look to you, For which way to turn,
To learn what to be.

Careful before you say, "Listen to me."
Children will listen.

Careful the wish you make, Wishes are children.
Careful the path they take, Wishes come true,
Not free.

Careful the spell you cast, Not just on children.
Sometimes the spell may last past what you can see
And turn against you...

Careful the tale you tell. That is the spell.
Children will listen...

Guide them but step away, Children will glisten.
Tamper with what is true and children will turn,
If just to be free.

Careful before you say, "Listen to me."
Children will listen...Children will listen!
Children will Listen, Into the Woods, Stephen Sondheim

Real Women are strong even on their own…
I gotta give my life some sparkle and fizz,
And think a thought that isn't wrapped up in his
The place that I consider paradise is,
Wherever he ain't! Wherever he ain't!

No more to wither when he's grouchy and gruff,
No more to listen to him bellow and bluff
Tomorrow morning I'll be strutting my stuff,
Wherever he ain't! Wherever he ain't!

It's time for little Nell to rebel, If he's in Heaven, I'll go to Hell!

I walked behind him like a meek little lamb,
and had my fill of his not giving a damn
I'll go to Sydney or Ceylon or Siam,
Wherever he ain't! Wherever he ain't!

Enough of being bullied and bossed, Ta-ta Auf Wiedersehn and get lost!

My little love nest was a terrible trap,
With me behaving like a simpering sap
And so I'm looking for a spot on the map,
If he's going south, I'm going north,
If he's going back, I'm going forth,
Wherever he ain't!
Wherever He Ain’t, Mack and Mabel, Jerry Herman

Real Women protect those they love…
Nothing's gonna harm you, Not while I'm around
Nothing's gonna harm you, No sir, not while I'm around

Demons are prowling everywhere nowadays
I'll send them howling, I don't care, I've got ways

No one's gonna hurt you, No one's gonna dare,
Others can desert you, Not to worry, whistle I'll be there

Demons'll charm you with a smile for awhile, but in time
Nothing can harm you, not while I'm around.

Being close and being clever, Ain't like being true,
I don't need to, I would never, Hide a thing from you
Like some
Not While I’m Around, Sweeney Todd, Stephen Sondheim

Real Women know what they are capable of…
Anything you can do, I can do better
I can do anything, Better than you.

No, you can't. Yes, I can.
No, you can't. Yes, I can.
No, you can't. Yes, I can, Yes, I can!

Anything you can wear I can wear better.
In what you wear I'd look better than you.
In my coat? In your vest!
In my shoes? In your hat!

No, you can't! Yes, I can Yes, I CAN!

I can jump a hurdle. I can wear a girdle.
I can knit a sweater. I can fill it better!
I can do most anything!
Can you bake a pie? No. Neither can I.
Anything you can do, Annie Get Your Gun, Irving Berlin

And finally, Real Women keep people guessing (this should be my theme song)…
When I'm with her, I'm confused
Out of focus, And bemused
And I never know exactly where I am

Unpredictable as weather,
She's as flighty as a feather
She's a darling, She's a demon
She's a lamb

She'd out pester any pest
Drive a hornet from its nest
She can throw a twirling dervish out of whirl

She is gentle, She is wild
She's a riddle, She's a child
She's a headache, She's an angel
She's a girl!!
Maria, The Sound of Music, Rodgers and Hammerstein

She is too fond of books, and it has turned her brain....Louisa May Alcott...

Really tired, so can't thing of anything to write... I got this from susan in stitches - this is fun... only 30 read... so obviously more a movie person than a book person, does it count that I've seen 38 of the movie/tv versions of the list!!! Nah... that's not true... just that I read different books from this list...I've got 7 full height bookshelves that are chockers!

If you'd like to join in, just copy the list as is. Don't add any other books to it. Bold the one's that you've read, italicise the ones you'd like to read. Some of the italicised one's I'd never heard of, but checked them out and they sound interesting...

1. The DaVinci Code (Dan Brown) - own book
2. Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen) - own book
3. To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee) - own book
4. Gone With The Wind (Margaret Mitchell) - own book
5. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (Tolkien)
6. The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (Tolkien)
7. The Lord of the Rings: Two Towers (Tolkien)
8. Anne of Green Gables ( L.M. Montgomery) - own book
9.Outlander [ Crosstitch in Australia and the UK ] Diana Galbadon - own book
10. A Fine Balance (Rohinton Mistry)
11. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Rowling) - own book
12. Angels and Demons (Dan Brown) - started it, but gee he writes badly... life's too short...
13. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Rowling) - own book
14. A Prayer for Owen Meany (John Irving)
15. Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)
16. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (Rowling) - own book
17. Fall on Your Knees (Ann-Marie MacDonald)
18. The Stand (Stephen King)
19. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (Rowling) - own book
20. Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte) - own book
21. The Hobbit (Tolkien )
22. The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
23. Little Women (Louisa May Alcott) - own book
24. The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold)
25. Life of Pi (Yann Martel)
26. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams)
27. Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte) - own book
28. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (C. S. Lewis) - own book
29. East of Eden (John Steinbeck)
30. Tuesdays with Morrie (Mitch Albom)
31. Dune (Frank Herbert)
32. The Notebook (Nicholas Sparks)
33. Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
34. 1984 (Orwell)
35. The Mists of Avalon (Marion Zimmer Bradley) - own book
36. The Pillars of the Earth (Ken Follett)
37. The Power of One (Bryce Courtenay) - own book
38. I Know This Much is True (Wally Lamb)
39. The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)
40. The Alchemist (Paulo Coelho)
41. The Clan of the Cave Bear (Jean M. Auel)
42. The Kite Runner (Khaled Hosseini)
43. Confessions of a Shopaholic (Sophie Kinsella)
44. The Five People You Meet In Heaven (Mitch Albom) - own book
45. The Bible
46. Anna Karenina (Tolstoy)
47. The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
48. Angela’s Ashes (Frank McCourt)
49. The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
50. She’s Come Undone (Wally Lamb)
51. The Poisonwood Bible (Barbara Kingsolver)
52. A Tale of Two Cities (Dickens)
53. Ender’s Game (Orson Scott Card)
54. Great Expectations (Dickens)
55. The Great Gatsby (Fitzgerald)
56. The Stone Angel (Margaret Laurence)
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (Rowling) - own book
58. The Thorn Birds (Colleen McCullough)
59. The Handmaid’s Tale (Margaret Atwood)
60. The Time Traveller’s Wife (Audrew Niffenegger) - own book - this is tagged as my holiday read
61. Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoyevsky)
62. The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand)
63. War and Peace (Tolstoy)
64. Interview With The Vampire (Anne Rice)
65. Fifth Business (Robertson Davis)
66. One Hundred Years Of Solitude (Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
67. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (Ann Brashares)
68. Catch-22 (Joseph Heller)
69. Les Miserables (Hugo)
70. The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
71. Bridget Jones’ Diary (Fielding)
72. Love in the Time of Cholera (Marquez)
73. Shogun (James Clavell
74. The English Patient (Michael Ondaatje)
75. The Secret Garden (Frances Hodgson Burnett) - own book
76. The Summer Tree (Guy Gavriel Kay)
77. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)
78. The World According to Garp (John Irving)
79. The Diviners (Margaret Laurence)
80. Charlotte's Web (E.B. White)
81. Not Wanted On The Voyage (Timothy Findley)
82. Of Mice And Men (Steinbeck)
83. Rebecca (Daphne DuMaurier)
84. Wizard’s First Rule (Terry Goodkind)
85. Emma (Jane Austen)
86. Watership Down(Richard Adams)
87. Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
88. The Stone Diaries (Carol Shields)
89. Blindness (Jose Saramago)
90. Kane and Abel (Jeffrey Archer)
91. In The Skin Of A Lion (Ondaatje)
92. Lord of the Flies (Golding)
93. The Good Earth (Pearl S. Buck)
94. The Secret Life of Bees (Sue Monk Kidd)
95. The Bourne Identity (Robert Ludlum) - own book
96. The Outsiders (S.E. Hinton) - own book
97. White Oleander (Janet Fitch)
98. A Woman of Substance (Barbara Taylor Bradford)
99. The Celestine Prophecy (James Redfield) - started it...oh boy was this bad...
100. Ulysses (James Joyce)

Cinema is the most beautiful fraud in the world...Jean Luc Godard

Not up for writing anything too profound at present...still a bit weary and wary...

Susan in Stitches has a similar list to the one below, except it was books... I'll do that another time... am a bit movie obsessed at present, so this list of the American Film Institutes Top 100 films seems more my speed... the films in bold are the ones I've seen, and the films in italics the one's I'd like to ... as to the rest.. no thank you...

Wow... I've seen 66 of these films...

1. CITIZEN KANE (1941)
2. CASABLANCA (1942)
3. THE GODFATHER (1972)
4. GONE WITH THE WIND (1939)
5. LAWRENCE OF ARABIA (1962)
6. THE WIZARD OF OZ (1939)
7. THE GRADUATE (1967)
8. ON THE WATERFRONT (1954)
9. SCHINDLER'S LIST (1993)
10. SINGIN' IN THE RAIN (1952)
11. IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE (1946) - Have DVD
12. SUNSET BOULEVARD (1950)
13. THE BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI (1957)
14. SOME LIKE IT HOT (1959)
15. STAR WARS (1977)
16. ALL ABOUT EVE (1950)
17. THE AFRICAN QUEEN (1951)
18. PSYCHO (1960)
19. CHINATOWN (1974)
20. ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST (1975)
21. THE GRAPES OF WRATH (1940)
22. 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968)
23. THE MALTESE FALCON (1941)
24. RAGING BULL (1980)
25. E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL (1982)
26. DR. STRANGELOVE (1964)
27. BONNIE AND CLYDE (1967)
28. APOCALYPSE NOW (1979)
29. MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON (1939)
30. THE TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE (1948)
31. ANNIE HALL (1977)
32. THE GODFATHER PART II (1974)
33. HIGH NOON (1952)
34. TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD (1962)
35. IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT (1934)
36. MIDNIGHT COWBOY (1969)
37. THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES (1946)
38. DOUBLE INDEMNITY (1944)
39. DOCTOR ZHIVAGO (1965)
40. NORTH BY NORTHWEST (1959)
41. WEST SIDE STORY (1961) - Have DVD
42. REAR WINDOW (1954)
43. KING KONG (1933)
44. THE BIRTH OF A NATION (1915)
45. A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE (1951)
46. A CLOCKWORK ORANGE (1971)
47. TAXI DRIVER (1976)
48. JAWS (1975)
49. SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS (1937)
50. BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID (1969)
51. THE PHILADELPHIA STORY (1940)
52. FROM HERE TO ETERNITY (1953)
53. AMADEUS (1984)
54. ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT (1930)
55. THE SOUND OF MUSIC (1965) - Have DVD
56. M*A*S*H (1970)
57. THE THIRD MAN (1949)
58. FANTASIA (1940)
59. REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE (1955)
60. RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK (1981)
61. VERTIGO (1958)
62. TOOTSIE (1982)
63. STAGECOACH (1939)
64. CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND (1977)
65. THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS (1991)
66. NETWORK (1976)
67. THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE (1962)
68. AN AMERICAN IN PARIS (1951)
69. SHANE (1953)
70. THE FRENCH CONNECTION (1971)
71. FORREST GUMP (1994)
72. BEN-HUR (1959)
73. WUTHERING HEIGHTS (1939)
74. THE GOLD RUSH (1925)
75. DANCES WITH WOLVES (1990)
76. CITY LIGHTS (1931)
77. AMERICAN GRAFFITI (1973)
78. ROCKY (1976)
79. THE DEER HUNTER (1978)
80. THE WILD BUNCH (1969)
81. MODERN TIMES (1936)
82. GIANT (1956)
83. PLATOON (1986)
84. FARGO (1996) - Have DVD
85. DUCK SOUP (1933)
86. MUTINY ON THE BOUNTY (1935)
87. FRANKENSTEIN (1931)
88. EASY RIDER (1969)
89. PATTON (1970)
90. THE JAZZ SINGER (1927)
91. MY FAIR LADY (1964)
92. A PLACE IN THE SUN (1951)
93. THE APARTMENT (1960)
94. GOODFELLAS (1990)
95. PULP FICTION (1994)
96. THE SEARCHERS (1956)
97. BRINGING UP BABY (1938)
98. UNFORGIVEN (1992)
99. GUESS WHO'S COMING TO DINNER (1967)
100. YANKEE DOODLE DANDY (1942)